Marquette Speech
Today I am speaking at the National Sports Law Institute at Marquette University. I have been asked to share my sports law path with the students.
Today I’m here to tell you the story about how during the course of 18 months, my dream of practicing sports law fell apart. Hearing this, you may wonder, “Your dream fell apart? Why are you here then today, lady?” If you’re asking yourself that, know that that is a solid question. After I tell you the story of how my dream fell apart, I’m going to tell you about the last 18 months of my life. The last 18 months of my life has been a whirlwind. I’ve been invited by the NFL to cover the Super Bowl. Last week, I was the only member of the media present in the Houston Rockets’ locker room during All-Star weekend, when the Olympic gold medalists received their championship rings. Over the last year and a half, I’ve appeared on hundreds of radio and television shows nationwide to talk about my passion: Sports. I’ve interviewed legends like Jim Brown and Yao Ming and was even recently invited to golf with Bubba Watson. Today, I have my own sports business columns on Forbes.com and The Huffington Post. I have an agent who is pitching me to networks for my own television show. Had my dreams not fallen apart, none of this would have fallen together.
Today, my hope is to share with you three pieces of advice to help you attain your own goals:
1. Dream bold dreams. I want to encourage you to create dreams so big for yourself, that you don’t know if you will ever achieve them. When it comes to dreaming, realism must be thrown out the window. A bold dream is one that you are always chasing after and fighting to make come true.
2. Create “yes” opportunities. Most of you have gotten this far in life, because throughout it, many people have told you “yes.” An undergraduate institution told you “yes.” Marquette University School of Law told you “yes.” A summer clerkship has likely told you “yes.” Sometimes though, people stop saying “yes” to you, and that puts the feasibility of your bold dream coming true at risk. When the world tells you “no” too many times, you must take it upon yourself to create “yes” opportunities.
3. Build—don’t burn—bridges with others. After creating a “yes” opportunity, the quickest way to achieve your bold dream is to build bridges with others to get there. There is a reason we are not all put on our own deserted island. That reason is because we are on this planet to serve and help one another. Building a solid network and standing out as an honest, helping and caring person are some of the things that can help you achieve your bold dreams the quickest.
Dream Bold Dreams
So, bold dreams. If I was to take a poll of what the dreams each of you hold in this room, I’m sure I’d hear some lofty things. From a young age, I’ve always had lofty dreams. I wanted to be a lawyer since I was seven years old. Embarrassingly, I picked this career because growing up, both my parents and grandparents spent a lot of time watching political television shows. Thus, the “celebrities” in my life were politicians, who got where they were through being lawyers. Thus, I equated being a lawyer with the ability to accomplish anything in life.
Believing I could grow up to be a lawyer was arguably a bold dream for me. My parents are the two greatest motivators in my life and truly, could not have been any better at the task of parenting. However, I come from very humble and middle class beginnings. My mom never graduated from college, and my dad actually never graduated from high school. He’s 62 years old now and jokes that when he retires, he’ll go back and get his GED. I told him I will throw him the biggest graduation party anybody has ever seen if he does that!
Yet, while statistics probably would have bet against my ability to accomplish it, I set forth on a path to complete law school. I worked tirelessly throughout grade school, earning only 2 B’s during my first 12 years of education: One in honors physics and the other in honors Algebra II. I went on to graduate from a small engineering university in Colorado, the Colorado School of Mines. In the fall of 2006, I started law school at Chapman University in Orange, CA.
I chose to attend Chapman to further my bold dreams. Growing up, much of my life was spent watching or playing sports. If you were to visit my parents’ basement, you would find sports memorabilia that my dad and I collected spanned from floor-to-ceiling. The faces that graced the walls of my childhood bedroom were of my sports idols. With my strong passion and knowledge of sports, along with my fascination with pop culture and desire to be a lawyer, my career path was clear to me: I would practice entertainment and sports law.
Chapman presented me an opportunity to be geographically close to Los Angeles. I immersed myself in the entertainment industry, working at both the Screen Actors Guild and Warner/Chappell Music. I attended industry events, where I rubbed elbows with top entertainment and sports lawyers and celebrities. I picked up business cards and sent networking emails. I was promised jobs and opportunities after graduation by the likes of Michael Jackson’s former attorney and the head of ASCAP. I truly believed that my bold dream of being a female sports or entertainment powerhouse attorney was well on its way to becoming reality.
Up until 2009, my life went according to plan.
Create “Yes” Opportunities
That brings me to my next point: Sometimes, to make your bold dreams come true, you have to create your own “yes” opportunities.
My life went according to plan, until, like many Americans, the plans I had for it were shaken apart by our country’s financial meltdown which began in the fall of 2008. By the time I graduated from law school six months later in May 2009, the economy had collapsed and the legal market was destroyed. Not only were jobs for recent law school grads few and far between, but top law firms across the country were laying off entire divisions, with some closing up shop completely.
For the first time in my life, my education, passion and bold dreams alone weren’t going to open up doors for me. The months between graduating and receiving my bar results, were some of the most stressful of my life. The economic downturn took with it any opportunity that my internships with the Screen Actors Guild or Warner/Chappell Music would turn into fulltime positions. Those industry leaders who once told me “yes, Alicia, we have an opportunity to offer you” were no longer answering my calls. I was swept into a job market where I was not only competing against recent law grads for jobs, but also 30-year legal veterans who had been laid off from our nation’s biggest law firms. I found myself spending hundreds of hours sending out resume after resume after resume to jobs that were not only not part of my bold dream, but jobs that I never imagined I would work in. To boot, much of these efforts were to no avail.
In October 2009 I was lucky enough to get hired at a small law firm in Orange County that focused on complex business litigation. It wasn’t what I wanted to do, but it offered me two crucial things: experience and a substantial paycheck. In August 2010 I took a job with a bigger firm in Orange County that represented Fortune 500 companies in the banking industry. Again, it wasn’t what I wanted to do, but it offered me those two crucial things: experience and a substantial paycheck.
For me, though, experience and a substantial paycheck weren’t enough. For someone who has been led by a dream her entire life, I found myself in a bit of a funk working these jobs. For this reason, I was thrilled in October 2010, when I found a job posting for a general counsel position at NASCAR. Truth be told, it was a bold move for me to apply. I had just under a year of licensed legal experience under my belt. Yet, I knew my capabilities and believed that I could offer the second-most-watched sport in the United States services that my peers couldn’t. So, I fired off my resume and cover letter and much to my surprise, shortly thereafter I received a phone interview. Then, even more so to my surprise, I was asked to fly to NASCAR headquarters in Daytona Beach for an in-person interview.
I was all of 26-years-old when I arrived in Daytona Beach as one of two finalists for the general counsel position. I interviewed with eight people that day, and thought I nailed it. When my interview was over, the senior general counsel walked me to my rental car. He told me that everybody loved me, that they were impressed with my qualifications and that I would hear from them soon. In my mind, I began preparing for my cross-country move and my new, really impressive job.
I spent six tough weeks that waded through the 2010 holiday season waiting for an answer from NASCAR. In December 2010, my bold dream bubble received the final pop. I was told “no,” again. “We love you, Alicia. And we don’t want you to think that you aren’t talented or smart enough for this position. However, we’ve decided to hire the local candidate.”
That was the last time that I let someone other than myself tell my dreams “no.”
While I would like to say that being rejected from what at the time amounted to my dream job spurred me into action to find another similar opportunity that would be a lie. Truth be told, I spent the first six months of 2011 sulking. I was mourning what I thought was the loss of my dream. My friends said they didn’t recognize me anymore, because my happy-go-lucky self faded. My dad one day asked that I not call him anymore unless I had something positive to say. For the first time in my life, I had been told “no” more than “yes.” And this had a terrible effect on me.
Sometime in the spring of 2011, I was on the phone with one of my best friends from high school who was enduring a struggle similar to mine. Her mother had given her some solid advice which she passed on to me: Sometimes you need to create your own economy. This statement struck me. I interpreted it as, “Sometimes you need to create your own ‘yes.’” Just because NASCAR, entertainment law firms and sports teams had told me “no,” didn’t mean that I had to accept that there was no way my bold dream was going to come true. I realized that if I wanted my bold dream of being a sports lawyer to come true, I was going to have to be the one to make it happen. The question, though, was how?
I’m a very religious person, so during this personal struggle, I spent a lot of time praying for direction. Where should I go? What should I do with these gifts I have been given? My passions are clear: I love to write, I know more about sports than most and I am a lawyer.
Finally, it donned on me: I should create a sports law blog.
On July 1, 2011, RulingSports.com was born. To me, the idea was simple. If a firm, team or league wasn’t going to give me the opportunity to showcase my sports law knowledge, I was going to create an opportunity for myself. I spent $20 on a WordPress site, read a “How to build a website for dummies” book and created a ridiculous looking header for the website.
Much to my luck, the NBA decided to lock out its players on July 1, 2011. Thus, the subject of my first blog post was legal analysis of the lockout. It was something that no other sports writer was covering, so on my first day in business, I received a significant number of hits. Since then, I have been given my own sports columns on Forbes.com and The Huffington Post. I am frequently quoted in publications ranging from USA Today to the Chicago Tribune. I receive close to 20 emails per day from publicists worldwide asking that I interview their sports-related clients for stories.
When the world tells you “no,” you need to take a step back. If you believe in your bold dream and yourself enough, you have to find a way to tell the world, “yes, this is meant to happen” and then make it happen.
Build—don’t burn—bridges with others
While creating your own opportunity is a necessity sometimes, you have to work tirelessly on building bridges with others in order for it to get off of the ground.
In the first weeks after launching RulingSports.com, I worked tirelessly to build strategic relationships which allowed me to grow the brand of my website. I reached out to other sports writers and offered to give them legal insight into the NBA lockout and the looming NFL lockout. I contacted sports radio shows and TV shows to do the same. I sent emails to sports lawyers and sports law organizations introducing them to the website.
While my contacts were strategic, it was also important to me that they were personal. When I set out on this venture, I thought about turning myself into a brand. What did I want the world to know about Alicia Jessop? I wanted the world to know that Alicia Jessop is a hard worker, who is kind to others, gives back to her community, is quick to think and knows her fair share about sports. It was these qualities that I shared in telling my story to the people I reached out to. Because I opened up on a broader level than just saying, “I’m Alicia, I love sports and I want to work in sports,” I was able to develop long-lasting relationships early on. Furthermore, these long-lasting relationships were with people who wanted to help me achieve my dream, since they understood what it was.
Every positive thing that has happened to me in the last 18 months is the result of a relationship I developed along this road. I wouldn’t have an agent right now if it weren’t for my friend, Atlanta radio host Rachel Baribeau, who thought enough of me to introduce me to hers. The NFL wouldn’t have invited me to cover the Super Bowl if I hadn’t developed a friendly rapport with one of their top communications executives. I wouldn’t be standing here speaking to you if I hadn’t maintained a relationship with Professor Parlow.
Being proactive in networking is one of the greatest things you can do for your career. Networking is more than attending mixers and causally picking up business cards. Networking is essentially the adult version of building friendships. You need to immerse yourself into the lives of your professional peers in a way that extends beyond your careers. You accomplish this by making your passions and interests known and by sharing your personal experiences. Networking is something that takes patience and time and you only perfect it by practicing it. If you ask anyone how they got to where they are today, they will likely tell you that it was through the help of another.
I wish someone would have told me in the spring of 2011 that my life was going to be better than I ever could have imagined. I wish someone would have told me that just because you have an impressive resume and education, that your dreams aren’t just going to fall into place. I wish I would have known the power of patience and its counterpart, persistence.
If there’s anything you take away from my speech today, I hope it’s this: Some of you may walk easily into the door of your dream. You might find yourself, as I thought I would, being a 26-year-old hotshot general counsel. Others of you, as it turns out I have, might have to travel a rockier road. If this is the path you find yourself on, don’t quit. Remember that you dreamed those bold dreams for a reason, and that reason was for them to come true. Make it happen.
Super Bowl: Day 4
I called my dad this morning and told him about the day I had yesterday. He said, “Alicia, are you going to have a hard time readjusting to real life?”
Yes, Dad. The answer is “yes.”
This week has been unreal. At every turn, it gets better. I keep asking God what I did to deserve all of this. I am so thankful for and humbled by this opportunity.
Yesterday morning began with an interview with Clay Matthews. We got off to a rough start when I said, “I know your longsnapper!” (Meaning, I know the Packers’ longsnapper). Clay heard, “I know you’re a longsnapper!” He looked at me like an idiot and said, “I am not a longsnapper.” After I explained that I knew Brett, we both got a good laugh and on with the interview. I was really impressed by Clay. He spoke a lot about wanting to be a role model off the field and to be known for things other than being a fierce competitor. There’s a lot other NFL players can learn from him.
After I talked with Clay, I headed over to interview Eric Decker about his New Era endorsement. My girl friends were all obviously jealous about this, but honestly, I was just happy to be able to talk to a Broncos player. Eric says the Broncos will play in the Super Bowl next year, as all of the foundational pieces are there. I sure hope so!
I had a really neat lunch experience. The team dietician for the Houston Texans was on hand yesterday working with Gatorade. She made a lunch for me so I could “eat like a Houston Texan.” The meal was delicious and consisted of a mixed greens and berry salad, multi-colored potatoes, a perfectly seasoned salmon fillet, a vegetable medley and roll. What a treat!
Later, Gatorade held a press conference. They seated me in the first row and told me to prepare to order a Gatorade and know what flavor I want. Later, J.J. Watt appeared and took my Gatorade order. He is a great ambassador for the brand.
I taped a couple of radio shows during the day, including my friend Rachel Baribeau’s show on CBS Radio Atlanta. Her co-host is former NFL and University of Colorado quarterback, Kordell Stewart. Once Kordell realized I’m from Colorado he started asking a lot of questions about what I do out there and the city. It was great to connect with him about our Colorado experiences.
After the radio shows were over, I walked back to where I’m staying to freshen up for a night out. I was lucky enough to join some friends at the Commander’s Palace for dinner. While I’ve experienced some great things here, this was by far my favorite experience of the week. We were literally treated like the queens of Commander’s Palace.
When our reservation time came about, we were escorted to our table. All of the table cloths were white and ours had a long, green satin ribbon stretched across it. I noticed the ribbon and just thought it was an interesting decor choice. However, I was later told by a friend who frequents the restaurant that this signals to the waitstaff that the table’s guests are VIP.
We chose to enjoy a six-course tasting menu which included things like crawfish gnocchi, caviar and the most delicious beef tenderloin I’ve ever eaten. This was the best meal I have eaten in my entire life. At the end of the meal, the head chef came to our table and said he had a couple of surprises for us. The first was a special moonshine he made especially for us. We all tasted the moonshine with the chef, and needless to say, it was delicious but potent.
Seated next to us was Houston Texans player Connor Barwin who inquired about the moonshine. Since it was made especially for us, he was unable to have any so I shared my glass with him. The group of people he was with were kind and fun, as was he.
After the moonshine, I noticed that a bunch of chefs and waitstaff were walking through the restaurant with an absurd amount of dessert. Little did I know that they were bringing it all to our table of three people. Yes, every single dessert that Commander’s Palace serves was brought to our table. Talk about feeling like royalty! These things were done for our table and none others that I saw, including Sofia Vergara’s. I really don’t know what I’ve done to deserve this, but it is a night I will never forget.
Dinner took upwards of four hours. It was worth every minute. After dinner, we headed over to Bud Light Hotel, where Flo Rida and Pitbull were playing. I called it an early night as I am growing more exhausted each day and trying to save as much energy as possible for Sunday!
Super Bowl: Day 3
Thursday was by far the busiest day of my week down here in New Orleans! Thinking about all I did exhausts me.
My day started with a press conference at the Bud Light Hotel. Each Super Bowl week, Bud Light literally takes over a hotel. They change all of the signage on it to read “Bud Light Hotel” and have crazy events throughout the week.
After the press conference, I walked to the Super Bowl media center. There, I attended a press conference on counterfeit merchandise. As a lawyer, this was fascinating to me. The head of ICE was there and he laid out the efforts the federal government and the NFL have taken to prevent counterfeiting. In the last 5 months, $13.6 million worth of counterfeited sports goods have been seized by the federal government.
Afterward, I headed to a press conference for the got milk? campaign. They’re unveiling a new ad for the Super Bowl. I had a chance to do a one-on-one interview with Kurt Warner. I’ve always respected him for his outspoken voice on his faith. He was a kind man whom you could tell puts family first.
Next, I visited with Green Bay Packers player Donald Driver. Again, Donald is a man who is known for his kindness and he was no different in-person. He announced his retirement earlier in the day, so it was fun to get the firsthand word on what his retirement plans are. J.J. Watt strolled up as we were chatting and it was cool to watch one of the league’s rising stars mingle with a veteran. They both had a mutual admiration for one another that was apparent and made them both seem humble.
Around this time, it was time to eat lunch. At the media center, Zatarain’s is cooking Cajun food all day long. It’s amazing. I’ve eaten like 20 bowls too much of jambalaya. As I was walking through to get my next bowl, I saw that THE Papa John was in the media center passing out pizza. So, I can now officially say I’ve eaten a piece of pizza from Papa John.
The afternoon featured a press conference on NFL health and safety. Many leading doctors were present and it was definitely a much different conversation than most I’ve been hearing this week.
After that was the main event of the week: Beyonce’s Super Bowl Halftime press conference. The room was full and I have never seen so many cameras flash as they did when she walked out 22 minutes late. When she hit the stage, she sung the National Anthem (and killed it) and promptly asked, “Any questions?”–as a snarky response to the criticism she’s received for lip-syncing at the Inaugural.
I actually left the Beyonce press conference before it was over and headed over to Don Shula’s restaurant, Shula’s. There, I met in a private dining room upstairs with one of my favorite bands, Train, for a one-on-one interview. They were so gracious with their time and kind to me. It was fun to talk about the muse for their lyrics and stories from the road. At the end, their lead singer, Pat, invited me to be his private guest at the band’s upcoming concert in Aspen. Amazing.
After I met with Train, I walked back home and changed into a cocktail dress. From there, I headed to a cocktail hour sponsored by clothing brand Express. There were a good number of NFL players on hand, including J.J. Watt, who I’ve literally seen everywhere this week. T.O. was there swiping more free stuff than anybody else–players could pick up free shirts, ties and socks. He definitely took several of each.
From there, I headed to the St. Jude’s Legends for Charity Event honoring Archie Manning. They had a phenomenal silent auction set up and the event was very well attended. All of the Manning’s were there, as were other NFL players.
I only stayed for cocktail hour at the event, as I had to next go to the Hall of Fame set up at the World War II museum. There, I had one-on-one interviews with Barry Sanders and Jim Brown. These interviews might be the greatest honor of my life. Barry was more shy, but well spoken. Jim was a hoot. We talked about the state of the NFL when it comes to protecting its players. He had strong feelings on the issue. He said he was impressed by me and asked me almost as many questions about myself as I did of him. It was a blessing for me to meet these two sports legends.
From there, I got in a cab and headed to the EA Madden Bowl at the Bud Light Hotel. There, top-NFL players like Drew Brees and Adrian Peterson were competing against one another in a Madden tournament. After the tournament was over, a really fun band came on stage. Then, Big Boi from Outkast performed for an hour. Around midnight, Lil’ Wayne came on. The bass was so loud but it was so much fun. It was also great to meet my friend Kelli, who is an NFL agent and a great woman to look up to!
Then, it was off to bed around 1:45 a.m. to get started all over again today!
This has been the experience of a lifetime!
Super Bowl: Day 1
Today is what I call a “unicorn day”– a day so good that you can’t believe it even exists. I feel like the luckiest girl on the planet that I’ve been given this opportunity and I am doing my best to make the most out of it.
My day began walking from my hotel to the convention center, which is housing the Super Bowl media center. Luckily, my hotel is within walking distance to the media center. However, even though I wore flats, my ankles were tore up by the time I got to the media center. I think I’ll have to buy some backless shoes tomorrow.
At the media center, I picked up my credential. I then boarded the bus to head to the Superdome for Super Bowl Media Day. On the bus, I was sitting next to a guy who has been to 30 Super Bowls. He was from Hawaii and always attends to send back video footage to the island. He was pretty entertaining and asked me funny questions like what type of makeup I thought he should wear for his on-camera work. I was one of only two women on the bus, so that was pretty interesting!
When we got off of the bus at the Superdome, we headed inside and had to go through a pretty long security process. This is where being a woman came to my benefit, as I was put into a separate line and moved through quicker than all of the men!
By the time I finished with security, my ankle was bleeding because of my shoes. A stadium employee, Warren, saw this and took me under his wing. He has worked at the Superdome for ten years and took me to get a bunch of bandaids. Once I got them on, I was good to go!
I then headed down to the field which was an amazing experience! The media day was sponsored by Gatorade, so they had a bunch of Gatorade tubs set up throughout the field. I grabbed one and went and drank it on the end zone. It was a fun experience!
There were various media sets, including NFL Network and CBS, set up on the field. It was fun watching them do their jobs. However, the most entertaining journalist by far was ESPN Chris Berman. Listening to him speak was just hilarious, as he is such a storyteller. He was going on for nearly five minutes about how he has visited 40 states. It was great.
At ten a.m., the 49ers took the field and the Ravens came on at 12:15. Media day can basically be surmised as organized chaos. Ten or so of the top players were at podiums and swarmed by the media. Lesser known players then just roamed around the field and you would have to hunt down the ones you wanted to talk to. It was easy to find some guys, and hard to find others. I spent nearly 30 minutes looking for the Ravens’ Michael Oher, to no avail.
When it came to media day, the Ravens were much more energetic than the 49ers. I don’t know if this is because theirs was later or because of personality differences. Nonetheless, the Ravens were more jovial, were playing jokes on each other and were quicker to just approach media members. However, my favorite interview was 49ers kicker David Akers. He’s had a tough season, but we spent a lot of time talking about faith. He told me about how he has used faith throughout his career–which has included being cut and forced to work at a restaurant–to persevere. It was a wonderful story.
After media day was over, I hit the French Quarter for some amazing interviews. The first was at Preservation Hall, which is one of the most famous jazz venues in the world. There, I met with creative director Ben Jaffe, who is the son of Preservation Hall’s founders. Ben is probably in his forties and has this big barrel of curly hair. He rode up to the Hall on a bicycle, greeted me and the next thing I knew, we were sitting in the dim room featuring Quaker pews talking music. It was such a cool experience.
After I finished my interview with Ben, I had a phone interview with Ti Martin, the co-owner of the famous Commander’s Palace restaurant. This woman is phenomenal. She’s so articulate and proud of her city. We laughed and shared stories and it’s safe to say that I hope to make this woman a friend.
Once my phone call with Ti was finished, I walked over to the Napoleon House. This was the house that was restored for Napoleon to be his home in the “new world.” There, I met with jazz trumpeter Leroy Jones. Leroy played the role of “Little Louis Armstrong” in the halftime show during Super Bowl XI. He also spent a decade touring with Harry Connick, Jr. and is a well-known jazz performer in New Orleans. Leroy was a gem. He was someone who was able to give me an oral history of jazz in New Orleans, while also laughing with me about which Super Bowl team better represented Democrats and which would be more Republican.
After leaving Leroy and the Napoleon House, I walked back to my hotel and wrote my first story of the week for Forbes. Exhausted, all I wanted to do afterward was fall asleep. However, i knew that there was more fun awaiting me.
Tonight was the Super Bowl Host Committee Media Party. The party was held at Mardi Gras World, where many of the parade floats for Mardi Gras are made. Walking into the party, a large marching band made an aisle for attendees to walk through, while performers on stilts worked their charm. It was one of the coolest party entrances I’ve ever seen.
The party itself was amazing. There were three stages for bands, and these jazz bands rocked the house! There were 40 New Orleans restaurants present, serving up everything from grits to alligator bites. The drinks were flowing and the space was lively as colorful floats could be seen in every corner. It was a treat!
After staying at the party for an hour, I hopped in a cab to meet some friends at Emeril’s restaurant. I have one word for this dining experience: Amazing. Emeril was actually in the kitchen putting his magic touch into the dishes. I ate a delicious salmon and we all split four desserts. It was one of the best meals of my life.
I’m having the time of my life. I just wish my friends and family could be here with me to experience it. I don’t know what I did to deserve this opportunity, but I am so grateful for it.
Your Super Bowl Reporter: What Do You Want To Know?
Here is the truth of the matter: I wouldn’t be where I am today without all of you.
When I launched RulingSports.com on July 1, 2011, I had no idea if anyone would read what I wrote (save for my parents, who constantly remind me they are my biggest fans–because they are forced to be). Much to my surprise, more people than my two parents read RulingSports.com on its first day of existence. And those people, and thousands more, have continued to visit it over the last 18 months. I’m aware that it is largely because of my readers and the kind people who follow me on Twitter that I am being given this opportunity to be credentialed for the Super Bowl. Your support helped get me here.
To say “thanks” for your support, I want to go to New Orleans and dig up the stories you want answers to. If you could attend a Super Bowl, what questions would you ask? What would you want to know? Where would you visit?
Tell me your ideas and your questions in the comments space below, and I will do my best to find the answers!
Be sure to follow me on Twitter (@RulingSports) as I’ll be tweeting many updates throughout the week. You can find pictures on my Instagram account (Instagram.com/RulingSports) and my Facebook fan page (Facebook.com/AliciaJessop). My sports business stories will be found on Forbes while my non-credentialed social interest stories will be found on The Huffington Post. Each night, I’ll update my personal website with updates on what I experienced.
I invite you to come along with me to the Super Bowl! It is going to be quite the experience!
My Path to the Super Bowl
I have a secret to share–one that my childhood friends will likely be surprised I am sharing, given my type-A personality.
I do not have it all figured out.
For so long, my life has been dictated by plans. Everything was mapped out. I’d go to high school and get straight A’s. I’d then go to a highly esteemed college. While there, I’d pledge a sorority and become student body president. I would then go on to law school. After that, I’d get some high-powered job. This was the plan. And for the most part, my life has gone according to plan.
Throughout my life, I’ve had a close relationship with Christ. I’ve always leaned on Him to direct my path. Or so I thought. Looking back at a lot of the choices I made up until the age of 25, I was directing my path. I wasn’t relying so much upon prayer to direct it, but rather, my own intuition and wants.
God handed me a huge curveball when I graduated law school. That curveball was destruction of my plans. As crazy as it sounds, the first time one of my plans didn’t work out perfectly came after I graduated law school at the age of 25 and waded through a tough economy to find an unfulfilling job.
I’m grateful that God shattered my plans.
I’m grateful, because He gave me something better.
Until the age of 25, I thought I knew where I needed to be. I thought I knew the road I was meant to travel upon. Since May 2009 though, I’ve realized that I knew nothing about my path. I had no solid idea as to why I was put on this earth or the purpose I was meant to serve.
Since May 2009, I’ve said the following prayer daily, “God, show me where you want me to be. Put me on the path that you want me to travel upon. Do with me what you want me to do. Give me what you want me to have, God.”
Here’s another secret I will let you all onto, and something that once again my good friends will likely be surprised to learn: Sometimes I have bad days. Really, really bad days. I try my best to always have a smile on my face and to always be positive when I am around others. Most of my mourning is done in private and my sadness is an emotion I keep to myself.
November 27 was one of those days. I had a brutal day at work. I realized that a relationship I had invested two years worth of time into was dead. I felt alone socially. And I didn’t know if I was just spinning my wheels with all of this sports writing stuff to no end. So, that night I did what I do when I’m sad: I crawled into bed and just cried. I cried harder than I can ever remember crying, save for when the first boy to steal my heart died at the age of 21. Underneath the covers of my bed, I cried so hard that I shook. I was letting all of my fears go. I was saying goodbye to someone I thought I’d hold forever. I was contemplating where these dreams of mine would sail.
And in the midst of those tears, in the middle of that pain, I gave it all fully to God. I said that same prayer I’ve repeated over the last three years. The difference, though, is this time I meant it.
“God, show me where you want me to be.” Should I be here in Colorado? My heart still longs for California. But I love being close to my family. Is there a trail somewhere new for me to blaze?
“Put me on the path that you want me to travel upon.” Is my work pleasing to you? Am I using the skills you gave me in the way you want me to? Where do I need to take myself to do what you want me to with these gifts?
“Do with me what you want me to do.” What am I here for? Who am I supposed to be helping? What am I supposed to be doing?
“Give me what you want me to have, God.” If this means letting go, I will let go of him. If it means moving on, I will move on. If it means my heart will hurt, let it hurt.
I gave it all to God that night.
I woke up on November 28 with bloodshot eyes with bags underneath them. I did the best I could to hide both of them with makeup and put on my typically chipper face and headed out the door to work. I dragged through the day with a lackluster spirit, but constantly reminded myself that it was time to give it all to God. This thought gave me peace.
As I was driving home that night, I checked my email while I was sitting in traffic. There, in the midst of my inbox, was my sign. It was the beacon I’d been searching for since 2009.
“Wanted to throw out a unique (and fun) story idea for you – come to the Super Bowl.”
Come to the Super Bowl. So casual. So simple. As if this was something I do every week. Come to the Super Bowl.
So, I’m going to the Super Bowl. I leave on Monday and fly home the Monday after the game. I’m going to be interviewing some really cool people and providing coverage that you won’t see elsewhere. To say I feel like the luckiest girl on the planet would be the understatement of the century. But, I feel like the luckiest girl on the planet.
And I am happy to be traveling this path.
Why Things Happen
One of my responsibilities as a national officer of my sorority, is to travel across the country and facilitate leadership trainings for collegiate women. Last President’s Day weekend, I was scheduled to facilitate a conference at the University of West Georgia. At the time, I was talking a lot to a guy who lived in Atlanta, so I decided to extend my trip to Georgia under the belief that he and I would spend a good chunk of time together. I took the earliest flight that Friday from Denver to Atlanta, believing that we’d spend the day bopping around Atlanta and then I’d get in the car and drive to Carrollton (where UWG) is for the night. I’d finish up the leadership conference on Saturday afternoon, head back to Atlanta and continue sightseeing with him until Monday.
Such was the plan, at least.
Given how early my flight out on Friday was, I opted to just text him before the airplane took off. “See you soon!” When I landed in Atlanta, I expected to turn on my phone and see a text message from him welcoming me to his hometown. Instead, there was nothing. And in fact, there was nothing ever again. Save for an awkward exchange regarding some flowers on my birthday, but that’s another story.
For the time being, though, I was disappointed, confused and in a place I had never been before. Alone. And with a lot of time to kill.
I’ve never been one to sulk for long. So when I clearly recognized what was happening, I was determined not to let his actions ruin my weekend. I created a “back-up” plan of sorts. And now, nearly a year later, I can truly understand why things happen the way they do.
At the time, I was taping a weekly segment on a show on a Birmingham sports radio station. The co-host, Rachel Baribeau, had reached out to me in November to see if I would discuss legal issues on the show. As I meandered through baggage claim, I Mapquested the distance between Birmingham and Atlanta: 2.5 hours. Seeing that it was about 11 a.m. and I didn’t need to be in Carrollton until 7 p.m., I asked Rachel if I could meet her in Birmngham and tape a segment for the show in-studio. Graciously, she said yes.
I grabbed my bags, picked up my rental car and headed west on I-20 to take my first trip ever to Alabama. Thirty minutes outside of Atlanta, I realized I was hungry and had no idea where to stop along the interstate for food. So, as I do so often these days, I sent out a tweet and asked my followers for recommendations. One of the followers to respond was Brent, an athletics director at the University of Southern Mississippi. He provided me with some good lunch spots that were both delicious and on my route.
After eating, I made it to Birmingham with enough time to join the last hour or so of Rachel’s show. Connecting with her in-person was a true blessing, as since that day, she has served as a mentor to me. A couple of weeks after we met, I told Rachel about how a former producer from Regis and Kelly told me that if I wanted my career to go anywhere, I needed an agent. Without any hesitation or me asking her, Rachel said, “I love my agent! You should contact him!” I never actually reached out to my agent, Matt, for fear that he would turn me down and also being unsure of what to say. I mean, “Hey, I have a sports law blog and zip television experience; do you want to represent me?” didn’t sound like too legit of a way to start a conversation. However, a few short weeks after my and Rachel’s conversation, Matt contacted me and asked if I was represented by an agency. Today, Matt and CSE represent me for my media work.
One of the people who saw my and Brent’s tweets about where to eat on I-20 was Ryan, who had just begun work as an athletics director at the University of Denver. Seeing that I lived in Denver, Ryan followed me. Upon seeing that he worked at DU, I followed him back. In the following weeks, we would meet over lunch. Over the last year, Ryan has been my listening ear when it comes to talking about where this path of mine is going. Over dinner or drinks, we often sit and discuss our aspirations, dreams and goals. His positivity and our similarity in interests have been refreshing.
During one of our pow-wow’s, I told him about how my agent said it’s critical for me to get on-camera experience in order for me to land a job. Ryan said, “How can I help?” At the time, I really had no idea how he could help. However, after hours of conversations and a handful of meetings, we finally figured out how he could help. Today, I taped my first segment as the host of the University of Denver athletics department’s “Pioneer Minute.” My hosting duties allow me to interview student-athletes representing all of DU’s sports in a manner which allows DU fans to get to know them on a level outside of athleticism. As someone who grew up attending DU games, it is as though my life has come full-circle.
As I was leaving DU today after taping my first “Pioneer Minute” segment, I couldn’t help but laugh. I thought back to how bad my heart hurt last February, when I literally was in Atlanta, all alone, with nothing to do. Or so I thought. As it would turn out, I had much more to do in Atlanta and a great purpose to fulfill. As I turned my key in the ignition of my car and got set to drive away, I looked in my rearview mirror and said, “that’s why some things happen.”
2013
Last Friday night was one of the most fun nights of my life.
I was a bridesmaid in one of my best friend from high school, Brit’s, wedding. I’ve been a bridesmaid seven times now, so my friends generally know that when they ask me at this point, I’ll roll my eyes and then give them a hug and say I’m excited. I then complain about the dress for awhile, moan about all of the activities I have to do that interfere with watching sports and then show up the day of the wedding wearing the “Super Bridesmaid” cape. Hey, when you’ve done something this many times, you get a routine, ok?
Brit’s wedding though, was truly special.
Yes, it was special for all of the obvious reasons: She was gorgeous, her entire family was present and she married one heck of a dude.
But for me, it was special for another reason: It took me back to my most carefree days.
I grew up around a solid rock of friends. Every Friday night, we would pile into cars, blaring music as we drove around the little American suburb our parents chose to raise us in. We’d sing and laugh, holler at boys and wave our hands out the windows. We were free and the world was ours.
Last Friday night, we all got together and did much of the same. We danced crazily. We sang. We laughed so hard we fell to the ground. Literally. Brit fell onto the ground during the best man’s speech, because she was laughing so hard.
For a few hours, all of the pains that have crossed into our lives since we left the safety net of our suburb were gone. The first heartaches. Layoffs. Planned pregnancies that were lost. Unplanned pregnancies that really threw things for a loop. Divorces. Disappointments when dreams didn’t pan out as planned.
They were gone. Happiness was our only objective, like it was when we were 16. And we sure met it.
It’s simple, but that’s what I want the most in 2013: Happiness.
And, so that’s what I’m going to do. In 2013, I’m going to chase happiness.
No, not in the ways that I’ve done in recent years. In recent years, happiness has been contingent upon a whole slew of things. Like my agent calling and saying the worldwide leader in sports wants to hire me. Or that boy I’ve been chasing for the last two years waking up and realizing I’m better than anything else he’s going to find.
I’ve chased those things hard, like a schoolgirl chases the cutest boy in the class across the playground. I’ve run and run and run and there has been some happiness. But, last Friday night, I realized that those things happening cannot be the only source of my happiness.
This year, I’m going to chase more memories with the things and people who have chosen to be in my life. I’m going to have more special dinners with friends, more serious talks with my mom, more sports afternoons with my dad. I’m going to take a deep look, in appreciation, at the things that are in my life now. And I’ll continue to hope that someday the wants of mine will find their way into it, too.
But most of all, in 2013, I’m going to be happy. Really, really, really obnoxiously happy.
Happy New Year to all of you. May you shine this year and do whatever it is that makes you happy.
Belief
This time a year ago, I was loading my furniture into a moving van and saying goodbye to the friends I had made over nearly six years of living in California. I had made a big decision weeks earlier, and the time to say goodbye to a place that captured my heart like no other was drawing near. As I handed over my key to my roommate, left my big furniture behind and closed the door to the moving van, I admittedly wondered if I had just made the worst decision of my life. Somewhere in me though, I believed.
I moved to California as a wide-eye 22-year-old who never lived more than 15 miles away from home. I had huge and lofty goals. And I had the utmost belief that I was going to accomplish them. At 22, there was nothing that I wanted more than to be a big-time entertainment lawyer. I played my cards fairly well, and had some great opportunities come my way. I spent time in the legal departments of the Screen Actors Guild and Warner Brothers’ music publishing company, Warner/Chappell Music. I was networking and meeting people and attending red carpet parties. My girl friends and I would clink glasses of champagne and giggle about how good life was.
In late 2008, I was sitting in my cubicle at the Screen Actors Guild when the economy crashed. I remember all of the secretaries calling their loved ones in disbelief as to what happened and the air in the office turning downward very quickly. I financed law school on my own, as I come from a very middle class family. Financing law school and attending law school in southern California subsequently amounted to six-figure debt. These two factors–the economy’s collapse and my debt–ultimately shaped my post-law school career decisions more than any dreams or belief in myself that I held. In 2009, entertainment jobs were few and far between. That is, unless you were willing to work for free or nearly minimum wage. My financial situation allowed me the opportunity to do neither.
In the grand scheme of things, I was blessed after I graduated law school. While I wasn’t able to take entertainment law jobs, I found jobs that paid me very well, had full-time hours and gave me generous benefits. Ultimately, though, I wasn’t satisfied. I wasn’t satisfied because I wasn’t pursuing my dream. I wasn’t satisfied because the strong belief I always had in my ability to go into the world and get what I want from it seemed to be evaporating.
As I have explained previously, on July 1, 2011 my world changed when I launched RulingSports.com. I believed that I knew enough about sports and the law to launch a website. I believed that others would see my passion and knowledge and embrace both. I believed that if I stuck with it, sooner or later, something would break my way and I’d find an opportunity to get back to chasing my dream.
In the fall of 2011, I faced a big choice. The law firm I worked for in Orange County wanted to promote me. It was a great honor, but the promotion involved me moving to San Francisco and billing a significant amount of hours more than I was previously. I was fearful how these factors would affect my ability to carry on with RulingSports.com and continue chasing my dream. I prayed a lot during this time, asking God to give me an opportunity to continue building RulingSports.com. I believed that He would do what was right for me, and sure enough, he did.
In November 2011, my old boss from an internship I held during law school at a prosecutor’s office in Colorado called. He had a position open and wanted to know if I was interested in it. The position involved a 25 percent cut in my pay and leaving my beloved California. However, it granted me more flexible hours and the opportunity to be closer to my family.
In making my decision, there was definitely some lingering doubt over whether it was the correct decision. I remember going to bed fearful that by leaving southern California, I was giving up on my entertainment law dream. My good girl friends in California vocally raised this argument. I had also built a solid network of sports contacts in California, and I was scared that by moving 1,000 miles away, they would evaporate. However, I believed that if I wanted the ability to continue building RulingSports.com and this new venture I was on of creating a sports media career, that I couldn’t be working an 80-hour a week job as an attorney. I took a risk, took a pay cut, left my sunny home three blocks away from the ocean and followed the belief I had in God and myself that everything would work out the way it should.
As I sit here and type this, and think about everything that has happened in my life over the last year, the only word I can think of is “fulfilled”. My heart is full and I am so grateful for the countless opportunities that have come my way over the last twelve months. I cannot say that these opportunities wouldn’t have happened had I moved to San Francisco and worked that eighty-hours a week job. However, I’m fairly certain that they wouldn’t have.
In the last year, I’ve continued building RulingSports.com. I’ve worked with seven different interns for the website, whom I would hope would say that I have mentored them. I was approached by and signed with a broadcasting agent in May. I was asked by Forbes to cover sports business stories in June. I’ve continued weekly radio appearances in numerous media markets. I’ve been interviewed on television shows and have presented before numerous college classes across the country. I was asked by the University of Colorado to teach a course in the summer of 2013. Most exciting, perhaps, is that I was recently invited by the NFL to cover the Super Bowl. I was in my car driving when the asked me, and I literally screamed because I was so excited and surprised.
The reason I note all of the above is neither to boast nor brag. Rather, it is to make several points:
1. Never, never, never give up belief in yourself
You know what your goals and dreams are more than anyone else. Additionally, you know what you are capable of better than anyone else. Don’t cut yourself short and quit on your dreams or yourself. Life presents obstacles. Sometimes those obstacles require you to take a brief detour from your dreams and goals. Do not let a detour turn into a complete stop. Have enough belief in yourself to know that anything you dream is possible.
I nearly put my dreams in a grave from August 2009 through July 2011. I don’t want to say that I was hopeless, but I practically was. I wish I would have told my 25-year-old self to be patient and stay calm and that things would work out better than imaginable. Have faith and believe.
2. Believe in the possibility of good surprises
After you exit childhood, the unfortunate truth is that more often than not, the word “surprise” is associated with bad news. Cancer. Death. Layoffs. Those are the “surprises” adults expect.
As someone who strives to be an eternal optimist, this obviously bothers me. Yesterday I got to thinking about the things I’ve been surprised by this year. This year has definitely handed me some blows. My cousin was hit by and killed by a drunk driver in April. Cancer took my beautiful 26-year-old sorority sister. Those surprises hurt. But then there were some amazing surprises.
Signing with my agent. Being asked to write for Forbes. Reuniting with an old lover for a brief moment. Dates with an NFL player. Or two. Being invited to cover the Super Bowl.
These were all things I never expected to happen. And that is what made each of them awesome. They were surprises to me in the purest form. And they were all good.
The lesson is, to never give up hope. God, the universe or whatever dogma you might believe in has positive surprises in store for your life. Sometimes you have to travel through the valleys and frustrating times, though, to get to them.
3. Believe in more
Two Saturday’s ago I had to get two new tires. As I sat in the waiting room, I picked up a copy of Rolling Stone magazine with a picture of Taylor Swift on the cover. In the article about her, Swift discussed a reoccurring dream she has. In the dream, everything is being taken away from her. She has lost her career and fame. It all ends. She discussed how she goes out and works every day with the fear that someday, we’ll all wake up and stop buying her music.
It’s hard to believe that someone with the level of success Swfit has achieved fears this. However, it is an understandable fear for someone who has arguably reached the “top.” I’m nowhere near the top of my game, but I admittedly sometimes fear that I will not go any further in this venture. When I haven’t heard from my agent for some time, I fear that nobody is biting. I get scared that a major media outlet will never give me the chance I want. I get scared that I’m never going to be able to fully attain my dream.
These fears are normal and natural. However, each of us would be better served by having belief that there is something more out there for us. If you are here on this planet and breathing, you have to recognize that there is a purpose for it. That purpose you are here for, is to do something more than you did yesterday. Believe in that.
The last year of my life has been better than I ever believed it would be. I’ve grown so much this year and have been blessed in meeting so many great people. I’m so grateful for this journey I’m on–the twists and turns, hurts and pains, and all.
Tuesday Truths: Simplify
On Saturday’s, I go for a long run through a cute neighborhood nearby my house. It’s my time not only to burn calories, but to reflect on the week I just had and what will happen in the coming week. It is one of the things I look the most forward to each week. It’s simple.
On my path, I run by a church. I always catch myself looking at the sign outside of it, the message on which changes each week. Last week, the sign was promoting a class the church was holding about how to simplify Christmas. It was a simple message about a simple class, but for this over-analyzer, it hit home.
The message hit the obvious chord it was intended to strike: Christmas is not about maxing out credit cards, freaking out over baking or out-doing the Jones’ with your outside decorations. Christmas is about celebrating the birth of Christ and recognizing that the birth of a mere child in the most meager of circumstances was enough to save the world. It’s as simple as that.
The message, though, also struck me much deeper than it was intended to. The question I’ve been asking since, is how do I muck up things by veering off of the simple path? How might my own relationships be improved if I were to simplify the way I approach them?
So often, I feel like the world tells us that in relationships, we need to be someone other than our simple selves to succeed in them. Rather than just coming to the table with what we have to offer, we have to accessorize it. We accessorize it with lavish gifts, expensive nights out and closets full of clothing so that we never wear the same things twice to said expensive nights out. We accessorize it with hair care products, fancy makeup and delicious smelling perfume. We come to the table, more often than not, not as ourselves but as some fabricated concoction of who we really are.
When it comes to the examples listed above, I am guilty as charged. I am guilty when it comes to my interactions with my family. I am guilty when it comes to my interactions with my friends. I am guilty when it comes to my interactions with my lovers.
I can think of numerous instances in my relationships with family, friends and lovers where I was led to believe that my simple self was not enough. Instead of just presenting myself as who I was and loving them, I took extreme measures to earn their affection. The thing about those extreme measures, though, is that more often than not they are not received how you might expect. In fact, they go unnoticed in large part.
Why is this? It is because showing affection is meant to be simple. You show affection by being a constant presence in someone’s life and someone whom they know they can count on. You show affection by saying what you mean and giving words of affirmation to those whom you love. You show affection by showing up consistently and always being your same, simple self.
Many of us can benefit by simplifying. And the method to begin the process of doing so is simple: Just believe that you, as you come now, are enough.
Alicia Jessop 